Parent: Good Morning Ma’am!
Me: Good Morning Ma’am/Sir… How have you been?
Parent– Wow! We are finally meeting the teacher for the first time since our child joined this school. He joined in 2020.
Me: Well, yes! I am aware that he joined in 2020. I was his English teacher in Grade 3. This year – I am his class teacher. And now, I get to meet you in person, for the first time. I am glad that you came, we have a few things to discuss.
Parent: Madam “How is my son doing? Has he settled down? He finds the school fascinating; he has never been exposed to this kind of culture and teaching methodologies before.”
Me: “Yes, he settled down easily and made new friends. He likes coming to school. He is picking up the values we teach and has started implementing them in his daily routines.”
“However, I see that his homework is incomplete, and he needs reminders to submit his work. Is there something that is keeping him busy at home, does he attend any classes?”
Parent: “Madam, we will get to that… but first can you tell us where our child stands in his class? Is he in the top five?”
Me: (perplexed) “Ma’am/ Sir, let me tell you this, here in this school we do not rank children in terms of their academic performance. We focus on their behaviour and values. Moreover, it is not fair and right to compare students, each student learns at his or her own pace.”
“Comparisons are harmful during formative years. Education is for him, and it has nothing to do with HOW much other person is learning or not learning. Your child’s learning levels will depend totally on him and not on other’s abilities.”
“I am aware that our Indian education system is generally marks-based. Once there is a quantified measure of something, people start comparing instinctively. Also in our system, it is presumed that higher marks mean higher intelligence.”
“For example, you get 67 and your classmate gets 97, obviously, people compare because there is a number in hand, as both the students have answered the same question paper.”
“But this is not fair to the students. It has the potential to demoralize students, make them feel like victims. They will lose interest in school or can become more rebellious and stubborn. A very few times it brings positive result but the chances of that is rare.”
Parent: “Then, how will we know-how is the child performing if he is not ranked?”
Me: There are various factors that determine the child’s performance, like:
Does he pay attention in class? Is he able to sit at his place for 30-40 minutes without getting fidgety?
Is he being moulded to be a good human being; is he compassionate and kind?
Does he respect his teachers and elders?
Does he value his relationships?
Is he punctual? Is he responsible? Does he do his chores by himself?
Is he able to articulate or express his thoughts and feelings?
If your answer “Yes” to these questions, then the child is making good progress. You will automatically observe that his scores will also improve in his subjects.
“Also, how are his social interactions? How does he behave with his friends or adults? Is he acceptive of them? Are they accepting him? Does he treat his friends equally even if they are different? “
“All these things make a difference.”
“Suppose, you go for an interview, does anyone ask you “how much did you score in Maths in 10th or 12th Grade?” Companies do a background check on an employee; do you think they check for marks, scores, or ranks?
This does not in any way mean that marks are not important. What I am trying to say is – to focus on the things that can bring scores and sustain the results in every field. This will be the new requirement for a Global citizen. They will be equipped to face the uncertainties of the future.
Today, as a teacher, I would like to request you not to compare your child with anyone else. You can ask them to learn (copy) the methods used by other students but not set the score targets based on others’ performances. Children are unique in their ways of growing up.
All children have an innate ability to learn albeit the pace of learning being different from that of others.
“A child is like a butterfly in the wind. Some can fly higher than others, but each one flies the best it can. Each one is different; each one is special. Each one is beautiful.”
Remember that “there is no comparison between the sun and the moon. They shine when it’s their time.
Parent: “Thank you Ma’am, for enlightening us, hereafter we will focus on things that matter for life. Thank you once again for making us realize that our child is unique, special, and beautiful.”
Me: “Thank you so much, looking forward to having a deeper conversation about the child in the future.”
By Srijana
English Teacher (Primary)
Tatva Global School
P.S: This is one of real-life experiences. The conversation has been paraphrased to suit the readers.